Game of Throbbing Nipple Thrones

For you Game of Thrones addicts, season three has begun and we find out who back stabs who, all for a chair of scrap swords.

First episode we saw a guy try out the newest body mutation craze, male nipple removal.  Now, I’m pretty tough.  I’m 6’1″, 230 pounds, a former weight lifter and three sport athlete.  But you come near my nipples and I’ll scream like a 3′ 1″, 60 pound geek. Owie.  This is why Famous Hamish (one of my many multiple personality disorders) can’t understand the world of body piercing.  Seems fitting in these days where everyone is trying to discard, stretch, staple, pierce, impale, pedazzles, vadazzles, and stuff their body parts.

I kid with a a blogger who stated she no longer answers the door for all the church people, roofing contractors, and even her small children.  I kidded her that soon those children will grow up and pierce, discard, stretch, staple, stuff, impale, and dazzle their bodies.  They will become so popular that the members of the band “Twisted Pierced Nipple Sisters”, will want to hang out at her house.  They won’t knock, they’ll just bang their heads against the door until it cracks.  They will overrun you and lay siege to your doomsday prepper stock of extra cheesy crunchy bacon jalapeno cheese Cheetos.

I’m already eager for episode two.  I’m sure some renegade punk rockers will be captured and tortured, only for the Lannister’s to discover  – they actually love it!  With thrilling dialogue like this,

“Come on Kingslayer, bedazzle me!  I dare you!  Denipple me you coward! Ooh baby ooh.”

If you love my script writing, just send me a message, I’m eagerly waiting writing stardom by my phone throne.