I have met some crazy and fun people following USA Today’s news and entertainment articles. One who I shall keep anonymous, admits to constantly changing her Avatar, or avie as she calls it. She shared a few of these with me from her Facebook account. Above is one she named Theivin Rita. However, being the nutcase that I am, I immediately saw her a “Penelope Pucker Puss”. Image her saying “sufferin sucatash” and then being hit in the face by a pair of dentures.
This one she referred to as Teenie Weenie, which had me on the floor in udder pain from laughing. However, my nutty (no pun intended) thinking saw “Big Bollocks Bobby.” Imagine this mutt walking all bow-legged next to you while you are trying to eat a Muy Bueno Burrito and he says “Yo Quero Tu Muy Bueno Burrito.” Now I speak and know absolutely no Spanish, so if this translates to something really funny, then I’ll take credit for it. If it’s horrid and you become violently ill, blame my Spanish teacher, Mrs. Bonnie McDonald from high school. Hey, even Scottish lasses want to know Spanish.
This one she named Sista Katina. From the early days of Saturday Night Live, I remember Rosana Rosana Dana. But I can’t reuse that stroke of genius portrayed by Gilda Radner. I decided to rebrand Katina into Sista Sarita Sarita Chiquita. Now image the shy Sista leading you in the Sista Sarita Sarita Chiquita Salsa. Even more frightful, imagine Bobby and Sarita in the salsa, the snack dip, not the dance.
At any moment I expect PENA (People for the Ethical Naming of Animals) to call and file a complaint and slap me up side the head with a slab of beef ribs or pink slime. I have a vision, quite horrendous, of being made to sit for a presentation of Lady Gagagozilla dancing with a chopped liver outfit and singing her new hit single, I just want to tenderize you.
If I have offended any Chihuahuas, toothless Grandmothers, or snack dips in the writing of this post, I offer my deepest and most insincere apologies. This is FUN! This is what life is supposed to be, to laugh amongst friends with wickedly creative imaginations.
As always, I appreciate blogger participation. Share your madness. Learn to spread communicable laughter, even if you have to defame your pets or relatives in the process.
