{"id":1027,"date":"2012-12-19T09:05:31","date_gmt":"2012-12-19T15:05:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ewgreenlee.wordpress.com\/?p=1027"},"modified":"2012-12-19T09:05:31","modified_gmt":"2012-12-19T15:05:31","slug":"spark-your-imagination","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/?p=1027","title":{"rendered":"Spark your Imagination"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"UFO\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Okay my fellow readers and writers, let’s share a moment of imagination.\u00a0 Whoever made this tree is certainly imaginative.\u00a0 What they didn’t know is that I am too.\u00a0 Today I was on Facebook with a British gentleman and author by the name of Danny Kemp.\u00a0 He is quite hilarious.\u00a0 He posted this photo and then I proceeded to corrupt it, my specialty.\u00a0 Some of Danny’s friends made the usual comments such as, “You have to give them a hand.”<\/p>\n

I tried, I really, really tried to keep it in the realm of Christmas thoughts with my first reply, “Ten cows a milking…five golden rings!”<\/p>\n

Well, it went downhill from there.\u00a0 My next corrupted thought would be if someone filled up this imaginative object with Helium and let it float over the city.\u00a0 You have to admit the UFO reports would be hilarious.\u00a0 Now using your imagination picture John Cleese dressed like a woman, with stockings hanging to his ankles and talking to Graham Chapman dressed like a policeman.<\/p>\n

Cleese: “I tell you officer it was like seeing the Hindenburg with nipples!”<\/p>\n

Chapman: “Nipples you say. Can you be a little more specific for the report?”<\/p>\n

Cleese: “Yes, rather brilliant white nipples.\u00a0 Some were pierced and studded with lovely colored jewels. Some were red, blue, green and even an inexpensive lovely chartreuse one. I didn’t know whether to stop or go.”<\/p>\n

Chapman: “Have you ever seen such colored nipples in the sky before?”<\/p>\n

Cleese: “I don’t like the tone of that question officer.\u00a0 I don’t step out of my pad each day into this dodgy world intentionally looking upwards for brilliant nipples! It was just there staring me in the face.”<\/p>\n

Now Chapman leaves the dame Cleese to search out more eyewitnesses.\u00a0 He runs across many whose descriptions are all different.\u00a0 He then runs into Michael Palin, a stodgy old reserved professional, no nonsense barrister.<\/p>\n

Palin:\u00a0 “Officer the most confounded sight just passed my eyes.\u00a0 It was a UFO.\u00a0 I am certain of it.”<\/p>\n

Chapman: “Yes, yes, we have had some reports.\u00a0 Can you describe it for me?”<\/p>\n

Palin: “Flying lactating cows.”<\/p>\n

Chapman: “Cows?”<\/p>\n

Palin: “In a cluster.\u00a0 You couldn’t see heads or hooves. Just the mammary glands.”<\/p>\n

Chapman: “Flying cluster mammal mammary glands? is that your official report?”<\/p>\n

Palin: “Yes officer.\u00a0 I’m curious what other reports have you heard?”<\/p>\n

Chapman: “Well it varies, some saw the Hindenburg with nipples.\u00a0 Most reported a Christmas tree made from surgical gloves, which is quite absurd, Christmas trees can’t fly.”<\/p>\n

You see,\u00a0 only from the mind of a man corrupted by the humor of Monty Python can see the absurdity and humor in all things humanity.\u00a0 Now using your imagination and with tact, what can you add to the UFO sighting?<\/p>\n

Come on now, help corrupt me some more.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Okay my fellow readers and writers, let’s share a moment of imagination.\u00a0 Whoever made this tree is certainly imaginative.\u00a0 What they didn’t know is that I am too.\u00a0 Today I was on Facebook with a British gentleman and author by the name of Danny Kemp.\u00a0 He is quite hilarious.\u00a0 He posted this photo and then […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[263,537,913,1277],"class_list":{"0":"post-1027","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-humor","7":"tag-christmas-trees","8":"tag-gloves","9":"tag-nurses","10":"tag-ufo","11":"czr-hentry"},"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1027","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1027"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1027\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1027"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1027"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allivarcreative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1027"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}